Goodbye Helen

It is really hard to lose a parent; we are never ready. I lost my last parent yesterday. As most of my readers know, I lost my Dad at the end of February. He and my step-mom were living at home (with help). They were the sweetest couple. My Dad had A LOT of trouble getting around—it took him a LONG time to get from place to place with his walker. But, every time he FINALLY got to the living room, where Helen (my step-mom) would be sitting on the couch, he would come over and give her a kiss. She’d say, “I think I’ll have another” every time. They would always hold hands and sit by each other. I think this is the last picture I took of them together. (Notice their hands?)

Helen had Alzheimer’s. She couldn’t do much for herself, but she always asked, “Can I help you with that?” Dad tried to do as much as he could for her and she for him. They were married 40 years. This is my favorite picture of them.

When they were more able bodied, they spent time traveling. They traveled the country in a BIG RV and wintered each year someplace warm. Dad never got used to the cold winters here in southern Indiana after that. They both still talked about their travels and smiled as they remembered “the good times.”

After Dad died, Helen was never the same. She would say, “Papaw Gene (what she called my Dad) went away, and I didn’t want him to.” Later on, she would cry and say, “I’m really sad, but I don’t know why.” She just didn’t want to go on without him. She stopped eating and drinking—something she could control. She passed away yesterday—two months and one day after my Dad died. I truly believe she died of a broken heart.

Helen helped me so much when my Mom died. Things were really tense between my step-dad and our family. He kept everything that belonged to my Mom along with the things my Mom had inherited from my grandparents—things of a sentimental nature, not of much monetary value. My sister and I ended up with no physical remembrance from my Mom or my grandparents. I remember going to Dad and Helen’s after I had spoken to my step-dad about those sentimental things. It was a very difficult situation. Helen cried with me and comforted me. There was never any doubt that she loved me and my family. She was Grandma Helen to my kids and Grandma Helen to my grandchildren. She was always there for me—for us. She was special.

I’m glad she is now with my Dad. She will be missed.